Thursday 18 October 2012

{Thriving this Winter} Day 18: Spending

Last night while I was shopping for inspiration about today's blog post I found some in an unexpected place. I was expecting to see a pin, or a blog that would get me going. But actually it came from a conversation with my mom. We were talking about what I would write today and I was telling her how like I have run out of good things to say. And her response was brilliant.

"Sometimes people need a break, it's ok to put things down."

Which, instead of having her intended effect of having me not write a post, helped me find a great post idea! Thanks mom!


Recently I have been complaining to Prince Charming about my health and how I feel like I have no time to improve it. I have told him over and over again that I have so much happening in my life that there is no more extra room, so any additions mean subtractions somewhere. And there is no place to find subtractions. So I am stuck.

He, of course, tells me that I am crazy and not stuck and I am just being a "whine-face". Which is true. I am just feeling sorry for myself. And he is also right, that when I want to I can find time for anything.
Time is not a secret, it is not sneaky. It is actually just math. And most of us, when we say "I don't have time for that!" Really mean to say, "I am not interested in that." Because we all find time for what we truly want to do.


So what about the things we end up doing, but when we really think about it, we don't really like or want to do. Well, I think this part goes back to the idea of comparing ourselves to an idea. This is the comparison we do in our head, where we say "well everyone does this, so now I have to do it too." Of course everyone and they are the same people.

So first of all, get rid of your expectations that come from them, and try to ignore them for a minute. Then think about what activities you actually beleive are important and good in your life.

For instance, do you care about a home-cooked meal, or are you happy just making sure the family eats something. Maybe you don't love to cook or are not very good at it. Not everyone has a home-cooked meal, everyday. You can do semi-homemade with a rotisserie chicken and home-roasted potatoes. Or home-formed hamburgers and frozen french fries. Maybe you are happy with doing a limited meal plan, and repeating things often. You love those foods, why not enjoy them! I once met a lady who said she hates doing a meal plan. She loves to be able to decide what she wants to make that day and not worry that she has other food spoiling in the fridge, or force herself to eat what she has planned when she doesn't want to eat it now. I know that I don't want to have a cute menu plan display because I would never follow it, and then just get mad because it would be a constant reminder that I am not following the plan. Plus I would spend way more time fussing over it than actually using it.


I just recently sat down and did just this. I actually thought about what I want to do, and in what areas I need to improve and where I am going overboard. Here is my list:


The + is areas where I am going overboard, spending more time than will help me reach my overall goals. The = is where I am doing ok. The - is where I need to spend a little more time. The +/- is where I am spending lots of time here, but not necessarily using my time well. 

This is just an example of a way to think about your time. I am sure many of you would have different goals and ideas, different roles to include and some areas to get rid of. That is ok, because the point is to get rid of expectations that aren't helping you, and to focus on how you actually want to spend your time, and the things you care about. To look for areas where you can put something down, let it go a bit, so that you can find time to work on an area that might have been neglected.

You can't create more time, but you can decide how you are going to use what you have. 


Are you spending time in the right areas?


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